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But I was not going to attack her boobs right away.I had made up my mind to play long and slow, but intensely too. I left her ear and took out my tongue further to rub it all over her left cheek. She had very smooth skin, with some little not-to-be-removed small hairs in front of her ear.I made it completely wet. I took some time doing that. I left my act, took myself back close to her ear, and said, “I want more of you. I want everything.”She was panting. A bead of sweat ran down her face, another from the side of her neck. She was hot. A thought flashed in my mind to put my hands in her shorts just to see how wet she was. But no. She left me craving, and so should I.I took my hands to remove the cloth from my eyes. Turned out it was the same stole used during our first sexual act. She blushed, I smiled. She had realized by now she was going to have an unforgettable sex experience coming up. For me, I had already got the trailer.And just at that moment, the lights went out. It. Oh my God, I’d done it, I’d invited him to my home. What was I thinking! What do I wear? What do I say? Will he like me? Will I like him? No going back! Then I hear the yard gate and know its too late — he’s arrived! Using all my inner strength I open the door and plaster on a smile. Phew it’s ok, he is still the lovely sweet man who had been chatting to me on the phone trying to figure out my needs and wants. I make coffee and we talked for an hour, how I regretted that hour now. Next time I’ll have him spank as soon he steps in through the door, heck I’ll even open the door in the buff. Even now I can’t explain why I want to be punished, why I want to submit and have him standing over me. He tells me that sometimes what seems like surrender isn’t surrender at all. It’s about what’s going on in our hearts, about accepting it and being true to it, whatever the contradictions, because the pain of not being true is often the greater cost. Murmuring ‘whatever’, I wash the mugs summoning.
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